Live and Learn, Any Day Given



What does a best friend mean to me?

A best friend is a very special person in my life. A best friend is a person in the world I know who will always be there for me. A best friend is not only someone I have a good time with; she is also someone whom I believe I can trust my life with. A best friend is the first person I want to text when the most amazing things happen in my life, and when the most horrible things occurred. A best friend is the person I will always remember no matter what happens. A best friend is almost like my family. A best friend gives the opinion I usually care the most. A best friend is the person I usually can be around always and never get bored. A best friend is someone I don’t envy, and is the person I am grateful to have as a friend. A best friend is the one who will forgive me always, even when I’ve screwed up so bad. She doesn’t care about my flaws and take me for who I am. A best friend is the number one person I want to see every day at school, always because she is the person who knows me the best.

I still remember the date – 14th of April 2014 (I remember cause I wrote that in my diary), that was the day when we first talked. We were on the second grade and in the same class. She was the first person who approached me, tried to talk and made friends with me, since I was new in the school. She was a very nice person. Very soft spoken and well mannered. She is a person who fits all the criteria that I listed above as a best friend. I was very lucky and fortunate to have such a great friend like her.

We have been the best of friends since then. We went recessed together. We shared food, drinks, snacks. We even went to the bathroom together. We did almost everything together. We hung out almost everyday. Everyone in the school knows that we have been best friends for life, or shall I say, BFF. She is not even a best friend in school, but sometimes she would come over to my house and we studied together. Every time one of us had family occasions, we invited each other. We would buy special souvenirs for each other every time we went on holidays, and we bought special presents on each other’s birthdays.

Then towards the end of February this year, I had a funny feeling that things were starting to change. We started losing the bond of friendship that we used to have. I didn’t understand why or what I did to cause this weird stage. It was very confusing and sometimes even made me really sad. Our friendship meant the most to me and I didn’t understand why something like that would fade away.

I tried few times talking to her. Asking is everything is okay and if I have done anything wrong. But she kept being silent and just walked away. I mean, I really value this friendship and I don’t want to lose it. I know it is normal to have misunderstanding sometimes, but things can be fixed if we care enough to talk about it and find a solution for every situation. And seeing her acting like that, it really breaks my heart.

Until one day, she wrote me a letter. So she was actually jealous of me being close with another friend. DUH. Like what the heck, we have been in the circle of friends together all this while. Myself, my best friend, the girl that my best friend is jealous of, and another friend. Four of us. I mean, we are like a group of gossip girls, we even have group name (you know la, teens will always have that).

And the most terrible part is when she accused me things that I didn’t do.

Well I heard that some of the girls were telling lies about me to her. They told her about all the bad things that I said to her which is so not true. I am very sad that she trusted them more than she trusted me. I confronted her, together with few friends. I tried to explain to her and told her that I still want us to be like how we used to be. Somehow she was not like the person that she was before. She hates me so much that she even told me in front of everyone, that she doesn’t want to be friends with me, ever again.

It really hurts that someone who means so much to you at one point in your life and then just vanish like they were never in your life at all. It’s almost like the friendship you created with them ultimately meant nothing. And even if you try to do anything, it doesn’t matter because she has changed, totally.

I believe everything happens for a reason. Well maybe our 4-years-of-friendship ended for a reason that I will never understand. The sad part is that I have tried my best to save this friendship, but seems like it is just not working. Maybe I just need to learn to let go and move on. Just like she did.

To you, dear best friend, if you happen to read this, I want to thank you for all the wonderful memories that we have treasured. I will definitely miss all of our times together and all the things in common we shared. I wish you nothing but the best.

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